Work and the natural hair

I've been looking every where for professional hairstyles that match my hair length but I just can't seem to find any that I can do myself. If I haven't mentioned it I got a job I was going for and its in a doctors office. I've been wearing weaves lately as a protective style and its a style that I love. I'm going to try an add a picture so anyone reading can see. 

I'm excited for this new position, its something completely new to me and I can't wait to see if its something I could love. While I'm growing out my hair I feel less attractive not because people say short hair isn't sexy which I believe it can be, I don't feel as attractive with short hair. My best friend is like a sister to me and she hates doing her hair and had her husband shave it off one day and she looked amazing. I wish I could carry that look and feel beautiful but I know that I would be depressed and feel so very unattractive. 

Like I've said before I'm loving my decision to go natural and I wouldn't change it for the world but I do wish I had more length. The shrinkage is what's kicking my ass. This journey has made me realize a few things about myself. I'm beautiful no matter what my hair looks like. I grew up being teased because of my hair and wanting to be like everyone else I damaged it repeatedly because I didn't know how to take care of it. I'm glad that my hair has been so forgiving and I'm going to do right by it this time. Relaxed or natural just be happy with you. Others will try to beat you down but don't let them. 

Some (not all) naturals and non naturals are being ignorant against each other. I've heard arguments for both sides and I don't knock anyone for their decision. I saw a special on tv the other day with women saying weaves are evil, and I'm thinking that's right the devil created weaves just to trap people (note sarcasm). Ignorance is a powerful thing. Yes I'm pro natural but that's for me not for the world. I want everyone to see beauty in themselves. My next post will probably only be a few pictures of hairstyles.

Possible Direction? Curly or Straight?

I know I haven't posted much of anything lately and I'm sure the two people who are actually reading this aren't mad at me but I figured I would add a few things because I just want to say stuff without people knowing me. I don't really care if any one judges. I find it funny that people say they don't judge but they really do.

Anyways, life hasn't been dreadful but it hasn't been wonderful either. I have a small sense of direction now when it comes to my hair. I find that I like blogging about it.. There are times when I really do hate it. I started by transitioning in May 2013 and continued on until around January or February 2014 when I got tired of the transition and cut off the rest of my relaxed hair. I was so happy to finally be rid of it but waited for the oh my God what I have I done moment. It didn't happen right away but eventually it did. My hair was crazy short in the front maybe about 2 inches long and I couldn't do much with it. I started to question myself but eventually just stopped. 

My hair has very tight curls, I thought coils and not curls but my hair stylist said my hair was curly so I said ok. I started to notice that the curls on the very top of my head weren't as tight as the rest of the curls on the sides and back and again this caused me distress because what was wrong with my hair that it wasn't all the same. That's when I realized I shaved the part that has the tight curls but not the part with the loose curls. I was confused at what to do. Do I shave my whole head and start again loosing a year or do I just work with what I have and hope for the best? I've decided to work with it and hope for the best. 

The hair in the front just reached to the middle of my fore head. I would have to really gel and spritz it to keep it laying down but now it reaches just below my eyes. Like everyone I'm dealing with shrinkage but I know that I have length and I'm now looking for hairstyles that will help show case it. My hair is long enough to bantu knot it again and I'm excited about that. I think I might start posting pictures of my hair.